There is lots of discussion in popular media about narcissism and narcissists. What is a narcissist? In a nutshell, they are somebody who can be very manipulative, cold (though act warm and charming as part of their manipulation), calculating, controlling, and lacking empathy. Inherently they are very unhealthy within themselves but do not see this […]
How it Feels On the Good Side of a Narcissist Read More »
Some people spend time and attention getting to know the signs that it is time to start a relationship: There is mutual interest and attraction; you are feeling a connection to the person; you would like to get to know that person more; you have the energy and time to enter into a relationship. As
When Is it Time to Say Good-bye? Read More »
In a previous blog post, I wrote about ‘The Dopamine Chase’ and how our brains can seek out increasing amounts of dopamine. Dopamine is the neurotransmitter that tells our brain when something was rewarding and that we should do it again (and probably more of it). This can come from feelings, relationships, substances, food, and
Boundaries are something that I often here people are not comfortable with. Usually it is because they have not had practice or exposure to the language of boundaries. I suspect another reason for the discomfort is that boundaries seem to have the connotation of being “bad” as they often imply distance and disconnect, which can
What is Detachment with Love? Read More »
In my last post, I ended off by saying we would talk more about healthy fun as often people think that Addiction recovery is a drag and work. The truth is, it is effortful and draining, for sure, but there is also an energy and invigoration that comes from it unlike any other. Where people
In more than one of my therapy sessions over the past few weeks, clients have been reflecting on their increased engagement with unhealthy food, especially chips. They are quite confused by this and don’t seem to understand what is drawing their brain to that particular food item, especially as it’s usually one specific brand and
What’s With the Chips? Read More »
While the pandemic of COVID-19 is occurring, issues with addiction, mental health, and other health issues continue. In writing this post, to be honest I have many more questions than answers as we are all living in an unprecedented time of uncertainty. What is striking me is the immense risk that exists for those who
Addiction and Recovery in the Age of COVID-19 Read More »
When you look up lists of feelings, they are often categorized as good vs. bad. This gives us the impression that some feelings are wanted, encouraged, and welcomed, whereas others are unwanted, discouraged, and, therefore, need to be avoided, shut off, and/or disregarded. From an emotional health and intelligence perspective, this sets up a problem.
From ‘Good vs. Bad’ Feelings to Just ‘Feelings’ Read More »
We are all pretty aware of the essential components of a healthy lifestyle. Eating healthy, even if you’re not a nutritionist, is somewhat clear; physical activity; down time; balance; moderation or no substance use; and probably some other components that you have picked up over time. We all know this intellectually, yet how come it
The Solutions are Simple, But Not Easy Read More »
I have struggled with anxiety throughout my life. Anxiety related to people, situations, performance, approval, not being good enough, safety, etc. It recently flared up in a deep freeze that happened as my brain was consistently on the prowl looking for possibilities of what could go wrong. Of course, there’s many. Furnace could break. Car
Anxiety: Our Fear Reflex on Overdrive Read More »
